Turtle fail

Dec. 4th, 2011 10:18 am
tvordlj: (Christmas Candy Canes)
You know the chocolates called Turtles? Caramel pecan covered in chocolate? I've been making them myself for years every year at christmas for presents. I used to make them for my brother in law but after their divorce, i kept on making them for the kids at least. One of my friends expects them as well. I've missed a couple of years but not many. Looks like this will be a missed year too. I did make them. I did them yesterday but i had a massive fail with the chocolate for dipping!

I bought the nuts and chocolate at the bulk store and i was uncertain about the chocolate chips. They were milk chocolate but that's ok but now i wonder if they were pure chocolate or not. They melted ok at first but then kept thickening up quite a bit making it hard to dip the candy. i thought i could thin it out so i added a little cream. That made it worse and even thicker as it "cooked" over the double boiler. Hmm... ok.. what else? Butter?  Tried that... seemed to work ok, it thinned it for awhile but it thickened up again. Still i continued on and coated them all. Into the fridge to cool down. I tried one later, though and it was rank! Definitely didn't pass quality control and i can't in good conscience pass them on as gifts. I don't think i'll get around to buying all that stuff again and messing around making them before the holidays so this will just have to be a Turtle-less year I'm afraid. I'll know not to use bulk store chocolate anymore for dipping.

I despair

Dec. 15th, 2009 12:35 pm
tvordlj: (AbFab Bitch)
I'm flipping through Vanity Fair, which is actually a pretty good magazine. I'm looking at all the glossy ads. This one for a men's cologne is using the very handsome Matthew MacConaughey. It makes me think the cologne probably smells really nice and sexy. That's what the ad is hoping i will feel, but, it worked except i'm not going to go out and buy it. Effective advertising, mind you.

I see an ad for a cream that will make you look 10 years younger if you use it regularly. The model in the ad looks about... oh...12. She probably is or not far from it. Now is that going to make me want to buy it? If i was in my 20s maybe. At 50? Pah. Not a chance i'll ever look that young. Advertising Fail.

Oh look. There's Demi Moore. She's got a new perfume out and there she is surrounded by the suggestions of hot young men. If you use this perfume, ladies, you'll attract them all too. Except. Well. Demi doesn't really look like herself. She looks about the same age as that other model. Maybe she's been using that 10-year-younger cream? Nah. Photoshop. This is what she looks like. She's a little younger than me and looks close to it. But she's still pretty gorgeous, isn't she? I'd be a lot more likely to want to buy her perfume if i saw the real her surrounded by hot young men. After all, she really did attract a good looking younger man and married him. And that was before she sponsored this new perfume. "Wanted" is it's name. I wanted to like the ad. But i didn't. Fail.

It's bad enough trying to sell makeup and products to make you look younger, using a child model or nearly so. It's even worse when you're making an adult with a few years experience under their belt look like one too. And Matthew? Yes it looks like he's had a few wrinkles and bags smoothed out of his face for the ad as well.

But he's still hot in that ad.

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